Oaktown Vibes is now Genius Unbound

De-cluttering minds and tapping into the genius of others.

Many of you have been following me since the inception of this page around September last year. Previously this page was known as “Oaktown Vibes” but as of recently, I have decided to change the direction that my page will be going in. With the new developments that are coming along, as well as my own personal growth, I have decided to change the name and web address of this page to “Genius Unbound”.

Initially when I began the page, I wanted this to be a place you can come to for positivity and encouragement. A lot of the content I shared was geared toward touching on issues that many of us can relate to, in hopes that no one would feel like they were suffering alone.

That aim has not changed entirely. I have a passion for people, to see them tap into their full potential, and that is where the new direction of this page is going. I have new content that will be published soon, but for the reader that is reading this now, your input is encouraged whether you engage with me in the comments with questions or to share your own wealth of knowledge that can spark a “eureka” moment in the mind of other readers.

I appreciate all of you that are following and reading this. I am extremely excited about the things that are happening with Genius Unbound and the new content coming out soon. Peace and love to all of you, I hope you all assassinate Monday and take the rest of the week hostage!



8 Reasons Why Self Help Books Are For Delusional People

Don’t buy another self help book until you read this!

The Self Help industry is estimated to be worth $11 billion in the United States, according to according marketing expert and blog master Brandon Gaille, founder of The Blog Millionaire podcast.

An alarming number of people go out and buy self help books with the intent of changing their lives, to no avail, just to have a $30 to $60 book collect dust on a shelf. According to an article by Matthew Jones which be can be found here at Hufftington Post , self help books don’t work.

A few good examples of self help books are Think and Grow Rich, The Secret, How to Win Friends and Influence people, along with countless others. Here in this article, I will give you 7 reasons why self help books are for delusional people.

1. Most people have a negative self image of themselves

Our thoughts and actions are a result of the self image that we have of ourselves. The main reason people procrastinate is because their deepest belief about themselves is in complete contradiction to the new direction that they desire for the lives to go in.

If you grew up thinking that you were a failure because of past mistakes that you repeatedly punished yourself for, chances are pretty good that at the subconsciously level, you still believe you are. You only go after tasks that you’ve done before, only doing things that you know you won’t fail at.

Your upbringing and current environment may have played a role in this self defeating image that you have accepted and self imposed on yourself. The way you see yourself is how you will perform, so if you’ve ever wondered why you cant seem to bring yourself to doing certain things, its because what you want to do is in conflict with who you believe you are and what you truly believe you are capable of.

2. Most people are held back by their fears

The biggest perpetrator to the individual is fear. Fear is a symptom of a negative self image. The cure to defeating fear is to focus on the image of you succeeding. Your thinking is the driving force behind all action, or stagnation. Sometimes, when you are fearful of something, time is unforgiving and you just have go on ahead and do it anyway.

No one likes to fail, not even me, but failure in and of itself is nothing more than feedback to the individual that has made up their mind, and made the choice that they will be successful at what ever their definite goal is.

Focus on the image of you succeeding, and then do it. Fear goes out of the window the moment you take a leap. The power that fear once had over you before taking the leap is gone because you have already taken the leap. Taking this leap will force the mind into gear to focus on finding solutions to survive before either plunging to your death or building something out of nothing in order to land safely, so to speak.

3. Most people don’t know what they want out of life

How many times have you asked someone where they see themselves 10 years from now? All answers vary, but in my experience, the answer is either “doing the samething” “buying a house” “traveling the world” or the most famous answers that I get the most, “I don’t know” or “I’ll get back to you on that”.

None of the above answers are wrong, no matter where you are in life or what age you are, but the problem with not knowing exactly what you want out life in clear vivid detail, is that you’ll be willing to do anything or you’ll find something you “want” to do with no clear definite end in mind. You’ll just be going along with the “motions”.

When you know exactly what you want out of life, you have a clearer image of yourself. You have no fear because more than likely, if you know what you want, you’ve done your research and you know exactly how to get there.

4. Most people have poor thinking habits

Everyone is “realistic” these days. If they can’t see it with their eyes and touch it with their hands, its either impossible or it doesn’t exist. Our current environment plays a big role in how we think because as far as we can see, what we can see is all that there is.

When our thinking is bombarded with all that is going on around us, “suggestions” are thrown at us by our family, colleagues, friends and media. Most suggestions given to us are glanced over as harmless, but unless we are deliberate with the thoughts we entertain on a conscious level, it will be accepted as truth on the subconscious level. When thoughts go unchecked, they take root in our mind until they become apart of who we are, our thoughts, our speech and our actions.

As a people, one of the most neglected day to day chores is taking special care of our mental house cleaning. It all stems from having a poor self image of ourselves, being fearful of our self imposed limitations, and not knowing exactly what we want out of life. When all three of the above are running healthily on all cylinders, our thinking habits are positive and our actions our proactive toward moving toward what we really want out of life.

5. Most people like to escape through procrastination

At the core of procrastination is fear. As discussed in the first point above, a poor self image is the mother of fear. Procrastination is the escape route toward dealing with any task in front of us. It feels good to procrastinate, even I can attest to that, but procrastination only gives you temporary satisfaction and leaves us feeling even more empty and unaccomplished.

When we have a proper self image of ourselves, we become limitless. Fear may have a hold on us temporarily but when we know what we want out of life, we approach and smash through fear with boldness and deliberate action. Taking action plays a trick on our mind, especially when the action is successful. With every successful action that we take, it forges and reinforces proper thinking habits about ourselves and our ability to follow through with continual action “until”.

The proper way to deal with procrastination is to turn everything off and get busy! Action is the down fall of fear and procrastination. When we take action, our mind gets into gear to focus on building on that momentum with the first action, by coming up with more effective ways to capitalize on the results from our first action.

6. Most people don’t have a clear mind

Often I will go out on to my balcony to clear my mind by focusing on other things. Although this has helped on occasion, there have been moments where I still wasn’t able to gain clarity. With so much going on in the world, our jobs, at home and social media, there is no surprise that most people have a full mind, instead of being mindful.

When your mind has so much going on, it makes it impossible for you to receive inspiration and new ideas. If you’re busy stressing about your everyday life, your past mistakes, the latest twitter post on a celebrity scandal, there is no way your mind can focus on what you either need to do, or figuring out what it is that you want to do with your life.

In the book, Clarity by Jamie Smart, the author explains that clarity is the mind’s natural state. When the mind is clear, the mind can do what it was meant to do and that’s to think and find solutions to problems or significant goals that we want to accomplish. If both of your hands are full of pennies and someone is trying to give you a brief case filled with a million dollars, you won’t be able to take hold of the brief case until you first open your hands, and let go of the pennies.

7. Most people play the victim

I grew up believing that my environment and circumstances were responsible for making me who I am. That lie couldn’t be any further from the truth. None of us are products of environment or circumstances. We are either victims or benefactors of our own beliefs that we have accepted to be true of ourselves.

Blaming, instead of accepting our role in our own shaping, leaves us vulnerable to what ever direction the wind blows. I don’t know about you but I don’t want to leave my fate in the hands of another imperfect human being or to circumstances outside of my control.

The moment we accept responsibility for all of the mis-happenings or good things in our lives, whether we initiated the cause or not, we take full control back to redirect our lives on to a path that we deliberately choose. One trait that I admire about the rich and successful, that is different from the poverty mindset, is that they all agree that they are in full control of their lives. They make no excuses by blaming others. They accept responsibility and they make adjustments until they get the desired out come that they want.

8. Most people lack will power

Mental laziness is a condition that people with unfulfilled dreams suffer from. Your being successful has nothing to do with a lack of resources, neither does it stem from not knowing the right people, it comes from all of the above mentioned points in this article.

A poor self image will leave you fearful about taking the next step. Being fearful will diminish your ability to figure out exactly what you want out of life. Not knowing what you want out of life will leave your mind vulnerable to poor thinking habits. Poor thinking habits lead to procrastination, in hopes that you will escape facing the task in front of you. Procrastination will leave your mind paralyzed and full of thoughts that don’t propel you to action. Not taking action will leave you a sitting duck to play the victim role instead of taking action to change your current circumstance.

When all of these above mentioned areas are in check and solidified, will power to take action will almost come effortlessly, in the beginning. The two main driving forces behind will power are desire and definiteness of purpose. When you have the desire to do a thing, you find your purpose. When you find your purpose, you open yourself up to clear skies to soar as high and as far as your vision takes you

Self help books are a gold mine

When one or more of the reasons given above are no longer an obstacle, self help books can completely change your life. I grew up thinking that self help books were for the mentally weak that just wanted to read a bed time story before going to sleep, just to wake up to deal with “real world” again. What I believed couldn’t be any further from the truth.

There are self help books for everything you can possibly think of. From business tips to learning how to declutter your mind, the right self help book can be all you need to take you to the next level in your personal development. Our education is never complete, even when you complete your formal education and are rewarded with a bachelors or a masters degree in your chosen field of expertise.
One of the biggest misconceptions about self help books, is that the book itself is suppose to change you after reading it the first time, without applying what you read and taking action. Self help books are just that, SELF HELP! You are the one that has to help yourself.

Action on your part is integral to the success of the book you are reading. Not all self help books come with instructions on how to apply the explained principals, which is why you have to be very selective about the authors you choose to read from. From my experience, most self help books just encourage you to feel as good as possible, say affirmations and to visualize a successful version of yourself living your dreams. All of this is very important, but none of it will be beneficial without taking action.
Self help books are for action oriented people, and if you can honestly say that you aren’t an action oriented person at this stage, theres a self help book for that, titled The 5 second rule by Mel Robbins.

Take Away

Self help books are useless if you’re delusional, and by delusional I mean believing that the book itself is going to change you without you having to take a single action. I’m a huge advocate of the law of attraction, but the key word in the law of attraction is ACTION! If you really want something out of life and you want to make an impact, you have to break through all of the negative points mentioned above in this post.

Self help books have a 100% success rate IF you are willing to take the time out to really digest what you are reading, and you are willing to put what you’ve learned to action.

Take Action

If you enjoyed this post and would like to feed yourself with more content like this, please subscribe to my blog and send me a message via the contact form above. If you’re always on the go and would like to keep up with inspirational quotes and captions, you can follow me at genius.unbound on Instagram. If you have any feed back or would like to engage in this discussion further, please leave a comment below.

The Key To Failure And The Reason Why You Wont Succeed

The man without laser like focus is unlikely to get anything done. Unless he focuses in on one single point, he will be carried away by every wave of life that comes his way.

The key ingredient to achievement of any magnitude is focus. If a person can remain focused on what they’re doing and why they’re doing it, they can work tirelessly as if possessed by a supernatural force.

These kinds of people have tunnel vision, the ability to focus on one end goal without interruption, no matter what is going on around them. The driving force behind why they’re able to pursue what they want, without fail, is their “why”.

If your goal is to impact people, you have to focus on the problems you’ll be solving and how it will improve their lives, not the accolades you will get for it. If your goal is to create large amounts of wealth in a significantly short period of time, your focus must be on creating something that people will get more use value out of, than you will receive in cash value.

The focus must be on what you will giving, not on what you will receive in return.

We tend to lose focus when we introduce ego into the picture. Rational thinking goes out of the window and we began to focus on ourselves and what we will get, instead of focusing on the good we will do as a result of remaining disciplined in the pursuit of the end goal.

When ego is the focus, the little things easily knock us off track. Instead of keeping things in the proper perspective, we began to take things personally, opportunities are seen as obstacles instead of something that will ultimately aid and serve the highest good of our focus.

The reason that a small percentage of people are seen as special or gifted (because of their accomplishments) is because they have learned the art of “blocking out the noise”. That “noise” is anything that takes away from the end goal. When it comes to family, work and other necessities, your ability to time manage is the issue, if it takes away from your pursuits.

All of your energy must be focused in on one point, with a laser like accuracy, if you wish to get anything done.

There’s a huge difference between always being busy, and being busy being productive. Time management is everything when it comes to staying focused, and setting aside time to work. If you give yourself 12 hours a day to work, you probably wont get much done, unless every minute of that 12 hour period is necessary to complete the task.

Breaking up your work time into smaller blocks of time, gives you a deadline, so that you have no other option but to focus solely on what you’re doing. Doing this forces you to focus all of your energy within that block of time, solely to focus on what you’re doing.

What throws people off when it comes to staying focused within that block of time, is having a successful “process” already in place before working. Finding a process that works is a process in and of itself, you have to go through the motion of finding what works and what doesn’t.

As you get the desired result that you want, after finding a process that works, you’re ability to stay focused is intensified. As you continue to produce the same result over and over again, you can then take steps to try out new additions to the process that will produce exponential, better quality results.

Focus, and achieving results, is a symbiotic relationship in which both components feed off of and build momentum for the other.

The ability to stay focused produces results. Achieving results as a result of staying focused, intensifies your focus even more. In order for you to get the desired outcome, you must first keep the desired outcome in the forefront of your mind, at all times.

You have no choice but to yield the result you want, when you are focused. Focus allows you to pin point what isn’t working, and it causes you to make the necessary adjustments. Focus minimizes the chances of you making errors of judgment over an extended period of time, because it will enable you to catch the error in judgment before it becomes costly and time consuming.


I never focus on things outside of the ring – Floyd Mayweather Jr

No elite athlete, entertainer, top business executive or world influencer made an impact by focusing on anything outside of their aim. Nothing of significance will get done unless you can focus on any given task entirely, at that present moment.

Final Thoughts

Championship games have been lost, business deals botched and lives in war have been loss, due to a lack of focus and being fully dialed into the moment when it matter the most. In preparation, that is when it matters the most, because the way you perform in private is how you will preform in public.

Always keep your eyes and your energy focused when it comes to doing what needs to be done, whether it be driving, cooking, dinner at the family table or in conversation with your friends and loved ones. How you direct your attention in the “mundane” matters will be the deciding factor in how you perform when its show time.


What you pretend, becomes reality.

If you don’t like where you are in life, simply change it. At any moment in time, you can decide that this is not how your story will go and its truthfully just as simple as that. As adults we have grown out of one talent that is the key to our transformation…playing “pretend.”

What I love about children is that they have no ceilings, the moment that they make their mind up about becoming or doing something, they never give up until they find a way to make it work. Over time as we have grown older, we have allowed the opinions of friends and loved ones to dictate our limits. Our minds have been conditioned by society’s view of what its acceptable. We have been duped into being more scared of what someone will think and say, more than we want to pursue what we love.

Now that we know this, we must stop it. The key to making any dream or goal a reality, is to first believe that it is possible and to visualize the end result that we want. This is where pretending comes in! In order for us to reach our final destination, we must already be there mentally. Literally! Do you ever wonder why some millionaires are able to lose it all and make it all back just as fast as they lost it? It wasn’t that their net worth was millions of dollars…they were rich in the mind first! They thought like millionaires way before making their first million.

For many of us, we have been programmed to think negatively, and we don’t even know it. Have you ever noticed that the moment we think of going after something, we think of all the possible pitfalls and all of the negative outcomes that “could happen.” Being that we are all pretty much adults now, it would seem smart to plan for a rainy day because things go wrong…right? WRONG! Planning for the worst is planning to fail. The only back up plan you should ever have is a plan to stick with the first one and make it better. When you make room for failure, you’re actually popping tiny holes in all of your tires before the road trip even gets started. You’re betting against yourself.

You must think and move as if it were impossible to fail. You must literally believe that life is rigged in your favor and everyone around you has a role to play in assisting you to get there. You literally become what you think about all the day long. This is why self talk and the way you think is so important. When you pretend, you assume the role “of”. When you dress the part, you get the job. Talking to yourself (or affirmations) is not so crazy considering that your mind literally believes what you tell it, whether its true or not. You will act on what you believe to be true about yourself…your words and thoughts are energy, they do have a physical energy. So is pretending, really “pretending”.

Oaktown Vibes

7 Reasons Why You Will Live A Mediocre Life

Most people love the mental image more than they desire to put in the work to get it. They are more in love with how the idea looks, than with the process of taking part in the actions that it requires to make the idea happen.

When it all boils down, it takes no effort on your part to fantasize about the life or the results we want but it takes 100% effort to make it happen. If it takes up too much time and requires a sacrifice, most people wont even make an attempt and they’ll even go out of their way to justify it by creating excuses, or what I like to call “crutches”.

People will dupe themselves into believing  their own excuses because they don’t want to face the fact that they never really wanted the dream in the first place. If this is you, I’m going to give you 7 brutally honest reasons for why your life will continue to be mediocre.

1. You’re afraid to stand out

People are creatures of habit and rarely like to step outside of what is comfortable. No one wants to be the odd one out, but in order to be #1, you have to be odd. The only way to be noticed is to be peculiarly different, and most people are scared to be themselves in fear of what others will say. Learn to embrace being the lone wolf, no one achieved anything great by going with the crowd

2. You’re just flat out lazy

If you can see yourself crossing the finish line, you are already half way there…all you need to do now is take the necessary actions to get there. The work that it takes to bring this vision to life can be either hard or effortless, it’s all up to your mental attitude and your “why”. Most people don’t do want to do the work it takes because their “why” is not strong enough. They want the success and everything that comes with it, more than they want to accomplish the goal, when in fact, success is a byproduct of the accomplishment. Having the proper perspective and a sense of purpose is the antidote to laziness.

3. You fear what your family and friends may think

Most dreams are extinguished before they even get started because most people are fearful of what others may think and say about them. It’s normal to seek the support  and validation of the ones closest to you, but when you have a vision that only you can see, you have to learn how to develop a thick skin and selective hearing. People will congratulate you for accomplishing something that they themselves believe they can do, but the moment you mention doing something that they believe is out of their grasp, you open yourself up to ridicule and negative feedback. Embrace it, and continue on. Its your vision and no one else needs to see it, if you can see it.

4. You lack imagination

The most detrimental thing any of us has ever been told, is to be realistic. Ideas that change the world are not “realistic”, they are revolutionary and they are ideas that the world has never seen before, hence the overwhelming impact of the idea to a point where the world has no choice but to change. Amazing ideas bring about extraordinary results. In order to get big, you have to think big. Not only should your thoughts be colossal but you have to believe in the reality you’re creating more than you believe in the current reality that you are now experiencing. In order to get to a destination, you have to see it first and experience it long before you get there.

5. You’re afraid of failure

We all would love to get it right on the first try, what ever it is that we are working toward, but failure is a key part to the process. Failure is where we learn about ourselves and we are able to see what works and what doesn’t work. This part of the process isn’t where we give up and go with something safe, failure is where we get all the answers to the test. When it doesn’t work out the first time, the second or the 50th time, our mistakes teach us the formula that will work the next time we attempt. Failure is where we find the winning lottery ticket.

6. You honestly don’t want it that bad

You aren’t hungry enough. Simple as that. People will fight tooth and nail for something that they really want. The difference between successful people and people who settle is this… successful people never quit. This mindset of never giving up is spurred on by hunger. What motivates one person may not motivate another but as mentioned in the previous points, your “why” is directly tied to this hunger and when your “why” means that much to you, nothing in the world can stop you. Period

7. You have toxic associates

We are the total sum of the individuals that we spend the most amount of time with. Energy is contagious, whether it be positive or negative. If the people you associate with have only been exposed to a life of working with their hands for everything they have ever gotten in life, they wont be able to comprehend an entrepreneurial mindset. You have to surround yourself with people who get it, otherwise you will be sucked back into the collective thought patterns of your peers.

The beautiful thing about being honest with ourselves, is that we have the choice to change the course of how our story will go when we pin point what needs to be changed. Bad habits can be disrupted and new ones formed. We have the choice to be proactive about our lives instead of just allowing life to happen to us. Choose to be great.




Revealing The Master Key In Winning The War Against Depression And Anxiety

The hardest part about change is believing that it’s possible.

We try to begin new habits, just to end up right back where we started. We invest in self help books, we even attend self help and empowerment seminars. Everything goes well, until something is triggered in us.

Those triggers are trying to tell us something about the already accepted beliefs that we have about ourselves, which is the root of why these triggers derail us from turning over a new leaf. Even in my own experience, I realized that I could not change until I came face to face with what I believed to be true about myself.

I thought that the “symptoms” were the problem, instead of focusing on the cause of the “problem”. After countless efforts and continual failure, I began to realize that I was trying to fix the “sink” instead of fixing the “well”.

I was trying to change my outer world before tending to the very thing that was the cause of my outward circumstance…myself!

I was bound by years of “environmental conditioning” at the hands of my parents, my family, my friends, the school system and the coworkers at my job but most importantly, I was bound by what I accepted as truth about me, although it did not originate with me. I was being limited by my own  subconscious beliefs in myself.

I could not break free from my own “self programming” the beliefs I accepted about myself as a result of “environmental conditioning”. It was conflicting with the new patterns I was trying to cultivate. I was at war with accepting the truth about where I was in life and why I was there, in relation to how my mind was previously conditioned.

Who we think we are, is the main cause of the decisions we make, how we see life and what we believe is possible. If we are told we can’t do a certain thing, that we are better of doing “this” over “that”, we limit ourselves.

From the very first day we emerged from the womb and took our first breath on this planet, we were limitless. Before anyone told us what we could or could not do, what was acceptable and what wasn’t, the world and everything in it was ours.

The root of Depression and anxiety comes from inner conflicting beliefs, our self limitations and expectations of ourselves. We have this image of ourselves subconsciously rooted in our minds and any action or aspirations that we try to manifest are met with inner conflict or dissolved altogether.

Race, religion, vocation, where we come from…we must understand that those things are not who we truly are. When we cling to those things, they will both empower and limit us. We cling to those things because deep down inside, we believe that we are nothing without them…but the truth is, without them, we are more. We are limitless.

The truth about who we truly are is this…we are the very thing that makes our heart jump for joy. We are the very thing that we want to see more of in the world. We are what we believe that we are lacking. We confuse our identity when other things that are not us, become our identity. We lose our power when we try to draw power from things, that are not us. Realizing this is the first step.

Life is a mirror and it reflects to us where we are in life. Our circumstances, as well as the people around us, are showing us the mirror of  where we are inwardly. We must see and accept this first before we can let go of who we think we are.

We may not like what we see when we take this step in realizing this truth, but this is the beginning. Change starts from the inside, before our circumstances will reflect what we really want to see in our own individual world. If you want your life to change, change how you see yourself and change the expectations that you have of yourself.

You are who YOU believe you are, not who others have told you that you are. You may ask the question “how can I tell the difference between who I think I am, and the person I believe that I am as a result of what others have told me I am?” The answer is found when you ask yourself these two question… “will I be judged if I choose to do the opposite?” and “how will it effect me if this person reacts negatively to my personal choice?”


Until we have consciously observed our own thinking and beliefs about ourselves, we will continue to be a result of “environmental conditioning”. Every thought that we think in relation to ourselves should be challenged, before being accepted as truth.

What we believe to be true about ourselves may not to be true at all, but it becomes truth the moment it goes unchallenged and accepted as true. When you hear a certain something repeated on the consistent basis without examining it, eventually it becomes accepted as truth.

When a new concept is introduced, it is often rejected as being false as a result of the subconscious beliefs that we hold true about ourselves, unless it agrees with the beliefs that we already believe to be true about ourselves.

Steps to identifying conditioned beliefs and letting go

1. Set aside at least 10 seconds to 10 minutes a day to examine your thoughts, without interruption.

In the beginning, this step may be difficult if your mind is constantly cluttered throughout the day with conflicting thoughts, hence the time range of starting from 10 seconds to an 10 minutes a day.

If you can concentrate solely on this step for 10 seconds, continue for a longer time period or until your concentration is broken. Restart again when you’re able to concentrate.

While you are examining your thoughts, pin point the source of the thought and whether it originated from you or if it came from someone else as a result of “environmental conditioning”.

2. Question every belief that you discover.

Once you’re able to pin point a belief, ask yourself “how does this belief serve me in relation to where I ultimately want to be?” Also, ask yourself “does this belief line up with my goals or does it limit me?” Lastly, ask yourself “ does this belief empower me or does it make me doubt myself?”

3. Let go of every thought that doesn’t serve you or your new goals.

The first thing we all do when trying to get rid of negative or old thoughts is by trying to fight them. By fighting them, we are concentrating on the negative thought. This is the main reason why they never leave.

You get rid of old thinking patterns by replacing them with new thoughts. Every time the old thought rears its ugly head, hold the image in your mind of the “you” that you are trying to cultivate.

Our emotions are our biggest ally and detection system. Thoughts that go unchecked, take root in our minds and eventually work themselves in our continual conscious thought process, before manifesting in the outside world with our words and actions.

When you start to feel bad, that’s your cue to replace the current thought with the image of what makes you feel good. The thought of the “you” that you are cultivating. We let go, by replacing our old thoughts with the new thoughts of who it is that we want to be.

Call to action

If this article was of any value to you, please feel free to follow my blog to keep up with weekly inspiration and informational posts as I go more in depth on the process of reshaping how you think, with a focus on Personal Development for success . For resources to further aid you in your Personal Development journey, I have constructed a list of recommended reading here. You can also follow me on twitter at @BadBoySwingin.

How Losing Everything Gives You The Advantage

The process of being stripped of our identity is painful. We live a large portion of our lives as “someone” we thought we were all along, just to realize that everything that made us who we are, can actually be taken from us.

Whether it be the loss of a loved one, losing friends, a painful break up or moving locations…all of these examples and more, are components that we assume as being who we are, our identity. Your true identity  is something that can never be taken away from you, and this is why the process of stripping is necessary for personal growth.

Attachment is what tells us that something or someone is not our identity. The beauty in this process of unraveling or “unbecoming” is that we discover our true selves, and that our identity is what ever we choose for it to be.

This pain of loss is the beautiful birth of new beginnings.

Most of us were taught how to think (or lack thereof) by our parents and our environment. A huge part of who we are, was given to us in our upbringing and by social conditioning.

Our wants, our dreams, our thoughts on love and life were thrust upon us before we even had a chance to form our own personal philosophy.

Years of being conditioned to think and live a certain way, in relation to observing the lives of others, makes us completely oblivious to the fact that we have a choice to question those beliefs and refine them.

Reality is subjective to the individual, and proof of this can be seen when you observe that over 90% of the worlds population is barely getting by, while the other 10% are living lives that most can only dream of.

Ultimately what I want you to see is that in that period of loss and uncertainty, you have an advantage that most don’t realize because all they can see is the loss. All they can see is that this is not the way life was going before and they fight their hardest to return to what they know.

Unbecoming IS becoming the person who will ultimately give you the freedom you are looking for, while simultaneously giving this world value from your own experience. Embrace the losses and embrace the uncertainty, because in the midst of it, the answers you are looking for will be staring you right in the face.

Use this power of “unbecoming” to create your own reality, and you do this by reshaping your own personal philosophy, instead of going on living with the one that was given to you. I’m not saying abandon your religious beliefs but what I am saying to you is that in the midst of loss and uncertainty, your mind is at its most receptive point to be reshaped for the life that you truly want to live


Success can not be pursued, like a butterfly, it will elude you every time. Success can only be attracted and you attract success by the person you become. Periods of turmoil are more beneficial to our success because it gives us the opportunity to examine where we are in life and how we got there. By finding out how we got there, we can plan a course of action on how to correct our actions and then take steps that move us in the right direction.

Ultimately, our actions are a direct result of our mental blue print or paradigm (the way our minds are programmed to think). The reason we hear true stories of millionaires going completely bankrupt and losing everything, just to turn it all around and gain it all back (and then some) is because that person’s mind was wired to think and operate like a millionaire. This is the same reason why lottery winners hit the jackpot and are back broke within weeks to months later…their paradigm was wired to think and operate with a poverty mindset.

You have to lose it all in order to rebuild anew but you also have to be aware of the opportunity that losing it all presents to you. If you want success, attract it. Read books dealing with finance, personal development, neuroscience and how to deal with people. A loss puts you in a position where you have no other choice but to think. Make sure that while you’re thinking, you build yourself up to be the person that attracts the kind of success that you want.

If you enjoyed this post or would like to add your input, please leave your feed back below. If you’re not exactly sure on how to get started on changing how you think, I have set aside some resources here that I use regularly and have helped me tremendously on my personal development journey and in reshaping my mind. You can also follow me on twitter @BadBoySwingin.

Oaktown Vibes